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[personal profile] rockettqween
Skip this entry if you're easily offended....


Okay, now that I have your attention.

An old Jewish man, tired of money woes decides to play the lottery. He and his wife think long and hard about which numbers to pick. They finally settle on their choices and the man goes to buy a ticket.

Bright and early the next morning, the man rises to grab the morning paper. He checks the numbers and sure enough, there are the numbers. Right there. "Honey!!" He says, "we just won 30 million dollars!"

They decide to buy a new house with lots of acreage, new cars, vacations, and decide to throw a party and invite everyone they've ever known.

The day of the party arrives. The party guests notice a large item covered by a sheet. Curious, they start asking questions about what's under the sheet but they are all told to wait for the unveiling.

Finally the moment arrives. The man gathers all in the backyard, cuts the rope and rips off the sheet to reveal a 40 foot statue of Hitler.

There is shocked silence followed by the man's relatives angrily asking what the deal is. The man rolls up his sleeve to reveal a tattoo:

"Where do you think I got the numbers?"

Date: 2002-10-15 09:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tyler1968.livejournal.com
The Pope calls his mother right after being elected Pope.

Pope: Hi mom, I've got some good news and some bad news.

Mother: What's the good news?

Pope: I've just been elected Pope.

Mother: What's the bad news?

Pope: I have to move into an Italian neighborhood.

Date: 2002-10-15 10:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tyler1968.livejournal.com
You got me looking at this site (which is really great, by the way).

Here's one that will curl your hair...

Disgusting joke, offensive to women, men, Doctors, homosexuals and senior citizens.

Guy takes his wife to the Doctor...

The Doc says, "Well, it's either Alzheimers disease or AIDS."

"What do you mean?" The guy says, "You can't tell the difference?"

"Yeah, the two look a lot alike in the early stages... Tell you what.. Drive her way out into the country, kick her out of the car, and if she finds her way back, don't fuck her."

Date: 2002-10-15 10:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tyler1968.livejournal.com
http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/88q1/7794.html

Re:

Date: 2002-10-15 04:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rockettqween.livejournal.com
That's a good one.

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